By Fumie Yoshida

My father will turn 60 this year. He may feel it's unbelievable more than anyone, but I also can't believe he will be 60 years old. Because I live by myself now, we do not meet often. However, I always feel he is getting old whenever I go home. His hair is turning white and his face and hands are getting wrinkled. I have never seen anyone as fatigued as my father is when he gets home from work.

He was born the third of five brothers in Yoshioka, Fukushima, Hokkaido. My grandfather was a delicate fisherman and grandmother was strong and brisk. To my knowledge, they were never a wealthy family. After my father graduated from high school he got a job with an electric company. It was at the time of the construction of the Seikan Tunnel, so he worked in Yoshioka, his birth place. There are some pictures of that time in his albums. In one picture he is smiling and wearing a sleeveless shirt and a helmet in the soggy tunnel. He worked hard and sweated when he was the same age as I am now.

There are also many travel pictures in the old albums. Most of the pictures were taken in the mountains and at the beach. He loves nature very much. He tends a small backyard garden in summer. I feel so sad because he has nothing to do in winter. He also loves cats. There are many pictures of cute cats in the same albums. He said he gave the cats milk everyday, which he bought from his low salary.

At the age of 30 he married my mother, who is four years younger than him. They never told me how they got to know each other, but there are many happy pictures of them together. They traveled around Hokkaido by car before the birth of my brother and me. They seldom travel now, but they still like to travel around.

My brother was born when my father was 35 years old, and I was born when he was 39 years old. My family moved to Hakodate before I was born, so he always went on business trips for his job on the Seikan Tunnel. He was at the tunnel when I was born and we didn't meet for a month. However, he always kept my picture in his chest pocket.

As long as I can remember he was very strict. He is clam, wears breeches and is always smoking, so I felt very depressed while growing up. When I think back to those days I remember that he always picked on my mother because of stress. When I saw him that way, I thought I'll never marry a man like him.

The way I see him has changed as I've gotten older. I used to hate him, but now it is changing to respect. In his job, he does electric work for the railroad late at night. He does it in winter and summer. He does it even during a hard Hokkaido winter snowstorm. He does some work like this even now, so I worry that he may catch a cold or injure himself.

He will be 60 years old, but he will not retire. He does his best for the Hokkaido bullet train project now, even though he doesn't know when he will retire. In fact, we want him to rest. However, it is a waste to make him retire because he has skillful techniques. He has been devoted to the job for 42 years since he graduated from high school, and there is no one else who has his skills. He is in good health and doesn't have any illness. However, I feel sad when I see him. I am very confused about whether I want him to retire or not.

He lets me do everything I want. He allowed me to take piano and English lessons, to go abroad and also to go to university. When I think of it carefully, he has allowed me do everything that he could never do. He started working at 18 years old.

Although I feel ashamed that he makes my selfish desires come true, I want him to continue supporting me for two more years. After that, I want to support him the way he has supported me. He was born in the baby-boom generation and he worked hard for his family, so he might be tired in body and in heart. However, I want him to live a long and healthy life and get along well with my mother.